I hate nannys

I was watching the Sopranos the other day and eating those Snyder pretzel wheels with the cheddar cheese in the middle. I love those things. Well I dropped the remote, and when I went to pick it up I inadvertently changed the channel. It was accidentally the first time I had ever even seen Nanny 911. This could possibly be the dumbest show in America. So here was this girl…about 9…and she is swearing at her mom. She hates her, she wants her to die, she thinks she’s ugly, and on and on. Now there is this nanny lady sitting in the corner taking notes like she’s some space observer for NASA. Well that night, after the mom is finished cleaning up the mashed potatoes that the girl threw at her during dinner, the nanny and parents have a meeting. The nanny breaks the news to the parents that they have no control over the girl, and that their parenting strategies are poor and need to be altered. Now the parents are looking at the nanny lady in disbelief…dumbfounded, as if they didn’t know. They start going over what needs to happen and that they need to take control of the situation. So when the meeting is over, the parents have this plan…surefire plan that can’t go wrong. Now I’m hooked. At this point I haven’t even turned back to the Sopranos to see if Big Tony dealt with the Carmine problem or not. So the next morning the mom is telling the little girl to clean up the mess she had made in the living room. Well the girl starts in with the, “I hate you” and the “You’re stupid” comments. Now the dad is the best. As soon as the yelling starts, he has his bicycle helmet on and he’s out the door and down the road like he’s lance Armstrong training for the Tour de Jonestown. He’s splitsville. So the mom is trying to put the girl in timeout. This is awesome. The girl won’t stay put, so the nanny is trying to have the mom hold her in time out. So the mom is in the middle of attempting a weak headlock on the girl, and it’s getting out of hand. So I’m thinking how great timeout is. I wish someone would have invented it when I was little. The closest I ever got was my dad taking time out of his busy schedule to beat me with a belt or two by four. I really missed out. So the show ends with me annoyed more than ever. I never finished the Sopranos, the nanny show is ridiculous, and why did my dad have to wear a belt for crying out loud. Oh well…chocolate covered bacon sounds gross.